you are going to be okay
It has been a while since I last wrote a blog. I had some issues with my college work. I was caught up in the idea that I might not get my degree on time, but after consulting with my department advisor, she helped me sort things out and make a way through. So it’s getting better.
I used to think that I am hearing disabled, that I am not accommodated in class, and that I wouldn’t be able to pursue education again because of the classroom structure — where I have to sit and listen (which I certainly cannot, since I cannot hear). It made me disheartened. Imagine going to a class, and the only thoughts in your head are about how you won’t be able to clear the course, how you will never be enough. But to be honest, that’s far from the truth.
Now I look at myself from a week ago, and myself now, while sitting in class — I believe it’s not even true. You can seek help, take notes from the sincerest student in class, re-read them instead of wasting time on Twitter, and if you have doubts, ask them to the professor the next day. You’ll be fine. If you tell your professor that you have a hearing issue, they will often go out of their way to help — sometimes by offering extra sessions to teach you the key concepts.
I was just wrong and skeptical about my whole condition. I could never really come to terms with what was happening inside my head. But it’s just a script you’re playing out. Flip it. If you keep telling yourself you’re miserable, you’ll be miserable. But if you admit you’re not in a good place and seek help, your mind becomes aware of opportunities — and it will find the right one and hand it to you.
It’s all just a script inside your head. Say to yourself: you enjoy what you understand in class. You love learning whatever concept the professor is teaching. You’ll do well. If there are gaps, you have professors, LLMs, friends — all there to help. Why give up inside your head before the world even gets a chance to pull you down?